Listening to: What a Catch, Donnie by Fall Out Boy

One of the very few songs on their most recent album that is actually worth listening to.

I have been doing STAR testing all week. I love STAR testing for the most part, it gives me time to read, or just sit and think. Or not think. All things I don't have time for on regular days.

I feel like things in my life are settling down once again. Probably the calm before the storm, but I'm enjoying it nonetheless.

Something has been bothering me lately, and that would be my dad's alcoholism. He has always been an alcoholic, and I usually just ignored it. But from what I hear from other people in my family (I don't talk to my dad, so I wouldn't know personally) my dad's drinking has been getting progressively worse.

Now, I know it would be conceited of me to think his alcoholism/depression is on account of me not talking to him, but it would make sense. My dad and I used to be closer than any two people I know. Then he screwed it up, doing things and lying about things he shouldn't of. I'm not going to go into detail, but let's just say he wasn't very nice.

Alright, to the point. His drinking worries me because I'm not there to tell him to knock it off and watch what he's doing. I know that being fifteen years old, I shouldn't have to take care of my dad, but sometimes I do. And I know I shouldn't care about him anymore, and I don't for the most part. I still think about him all the time.

Everytime I go to the store, and see a girl with their dad, it breaks my heart. Because I remember those days like they were yesterday. The days when we used to be friends.

Mk, that's enough venting for one blog.

Love you all,

Kayla Marie